A Coop Full of Crazy (Part 1)

I have chickens.  Four chickens- to be exact.  Their names are as follows: Nettie Buttercup, Lily Sparkles, Esme Chrysanthemum and Sketchy Longneck.  Yep, they are all double-namers.  And yep, I know the names are hilarious.

I have had nine chickens since May of 2009.  In January of that year, I decided I wanted chickens.  I started the frontal assault on Black Hair.  It went something like this:

Earth Momma: I want chickens.

Black Hair: No.

Earth Momma: They would give us eggs and eat all of those pesky mosquitoes.

Black Hair: Hell No

Earth Momma: They would teach our child where her food comes from and how to be a good steward of the earth.

Black Hair: They stink so…NO.  Besides, where would you put them?

Earth Momma:  Oh.  Didn’t I mention that the neighbor down the street is willing to give me his rabbit hutch if I use your truck and get it out of his side yard?   And they only stink if you don’t keep their living area clean.  I can put their poop in the compost pile.

Black Hair: No.  I think they’re illegal.

Earth Momma: OK. Sure, I’ll make you a Power Point presentation of why we should have chickens and the laws don’t actually say I can’t have them.  It was a little vague.  And I won’t get roosters so the neighbors won’t even know they are here.

Black Hair: Whatever.  You don’t know how to make a Power Point and…No.

So in February I did a Power Point presentation (because I needed to prove that I could) and in April I brought home a rabbit hutch, which I cleaned up, rehabbed and painted bright red.  Black Hair wanted it to be orange and blue & GC 1 wanted purple but I trumped everyone and chose red because the mis-tint cheap paint I found was red.  Besides, red is very farm-like and I had visions of urban farming dancing in my deluded little brain.

In May, we took a family outing to the local Feed and Seed and we picked out our chicks.  It went something like this:

Black Hair- I want that one.

Earth Momma:  You don’t get to choose.  You don’t want chickens, remember?

CG1: I want that one.

Earth Momma: Are you sure?  That one looks like it might be a boy and it pecked me.  I think it might be mean.

CG1:  Yes, I’m sure.  I feel sorry for it.  If we don’t take it no one else will.

Black Hair: I want that one.

Earth Momma:  Fine.  But if you choose one you can’t fuss at me later about chicken stuff.

Black Hair:  I’m not making promises but I really like that one.

So, home we went with five little chicks in a cardboard box and enough feed to feed them for a century.  This was the easiest & cheapest pet I have ever purchased.  Or so I ridiculously thought at that moment.

To Be Continued

I'll post the rest of the story next time I have a minute.

Earth Momma